Gone Fishin'

Hypnosis 101: An introduction to persuasive yawning

by Nick P. Divito

You're getting sleepy. Very sleepy.
Your body is weighted, as are your eye-lids, and your mind wanders to irrelevancies.
And for some reason, this professor is especially boring today.
The cold, crisp wind that chills your soul makes you want to crawl back into your cozy apartment, pull the curtains closed and hibernate.
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...
Every ounce of strength left within you is spent. The little sleep you did get last night was uneasy, remember? You tossed and turned and woke up with your pillows on the floor.
And to think you actually have to walk from this end of campus all the way over to the other.
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...
The minutes drag on. Seconds last an eternity.
Your seating is becoming more and more comfortable.
It seems like your body is melting along with your mind.
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...
Your eyes are welled up with post-yawn tears. Your energy slowly drips down your arms and off of your fingertips.
Your want to succumb, to fall fast asleep wherever you are. But you must drag your cantankerous being through the day.
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...
Words become hazy, images become faint. Comprehension is beyond you at this point; all you can focus on is your billowing pillow.
Your head is bobbing as you read, your eye-muscles becoming sore from the unrelenting force they must exert.
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...
The heavens above are weighing upon you; the Earth's gravitational pull is bringing you down.
Your books are getting heavier, your pen difficult to maneuver.
Your eyesight is getting blurry.
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...
The sleep in your eyes is building, your legs are falling asleep.
You should've gone to bed earlier, shouldn't have gotten up so early.
That glassy look in your eyes says it all:
You're tired.
Sleepy.
Exhausted.
Yawn ...

Nick P. Divito is curious to know if his experiment in making you feel tired was successful. Please e-mail him at divito@scf.usc.edu with feedback.