Striking out when it comes to homers

esides being Pete Carroll's first season as coach at USC, this year is also KMPC's (1540) first season as the Trojans' radio broadcast station.

USC left radio powerhouse XTRA (690) and (alleged racist) play-by-play man Lee Hamilton after three years with the station.

The debut broadcast of Saturday's 21-10 win over San Jose State featured former play-by-play man Pete Arbogast, retained color commentator Paul McDonald and sideline reporter Tim Ryan.

The broadcast was like an American League baseball game.

Plenty of homers.

Some choice samplings:

"The grand old lady (the Coliseum) in front of us looks magnificent as always, perfectly preserved and ready to host another great season of Trojan football," Arbogast said in the opening segment.

Sounds like a former Daily Trojan columnist.

"We're all decked out in our cardinal and gold now, perhaps, Trojans and we will all start another golden age again and all will be right with the universe," Arbogast said.

The universe?

Hey mon, I felt like I was listening to Miss Cleo the psychic.

Ryan, of course, was the epitome of objectivity.

"I feel sorry for you sitting up in that booth. I'm down here right next to Dr. Bartner, leading the band," Ryan said to Arbogast and McDonald. "USC's band, guys ... so historical, so famousthe tradition is tremendous. I don't know about you guys, but (I'm) absolutely ready for the Peter Carroll era to begin."

I wonder if Bartner yelled and made Ryan runs laps for being off-key.

The start was shaky at best for KMPC. Early in the broadcast, a technical glitch left Arbogast and McDonald talking without realizing they were back on the air.

The actual game call was decent, although the game itself had a drowsy, Nyquil-like effect.

Obviously, Arbogast, McDonald and Ryan were happy to be there. Maybe they were just overjoyed with not having to interview that media-savvy Paul Hackett anymore.

Carroll, after all, is so good to the media, he might as well serve the food at the media luncheon.

That said, objectivity is an often-impossible task, even in print journalism. The honks in the Notre Dame press box are as notorious cheerleaders as are much of the staff member at this very newspaper.

But broadcasters are usually as guilty as O.J. when it comes to being paid fans. The same held true, somewhat, for KMPC on Saturday.

"I don't say Śwe'," McDonald said Tuesday, despite some casual usage of the word on Saturday. "I try to be as objective as possible. If USC makes a bad play, we're also going to talk about the other team making a good play."

McDonald was the least guilty, although an overall tone-down of Trojan rah-rah would be nice. The challenge is therelet's see what they say when Kansas State kicks USC around like a rag doll.

Besides, it is that kind of talk that makes people believe USC is still a football power.

Just as I suspected. After spending a summer in Portland, Ore. Oregonians almost had me brainwashed into thinking Oregon and Oregon State were national title contenders.

Oregon will be lucky Ducks to survive without a loss and Oregon State is like the "Planet of the Apes"an over-hyped summer disaster.

At least we can figure out the ending to these blockbusters. It's not in Pasadena.

Former Washington State linebacker Melvin Simmons is doing his best to transfer to USC. But don't blame him for not going to last week's game against San Jose State.

After his car wouldn't start, Simmons called his aunt to ask if she wanted to go to the game. Sure, she said. But he'd have to run some errands with her first.

Like most men, he didn't want to get there at halftime so he watched it on television.

You can reach David Cisneros at (213) 740-5671 or by e-mail at cisneros@usc.edu.

Copyright 2001 by the Daily Trojan. All rights reserved.
This article was published in Vol. 144, No. 07 (Thursday, September 6, 2001), beginning on page 20 and ending on page 15.